chookies are picky with their food too...

my brain is sore...

my internal balances feel unbalanced...

at the moment it feels like everyone wants a piece of me

which means i'm feeling like a victim but i don't want to play the victim as everyone just shrugs shoulders at you for trying to seek attention...

so days like today are where my brain does the thought of "it would be nice to have someone to come home to and cuddle" and then a few seconds later i get over it... today it lingered a bit longer than a few seconds... maybe 5 minutes...

but nonetheless, i get to the same conclusion - i think about the trouble it can be having a relationship, the inability to make decisions for myself without having to feel like i have to consult against someone else for permission...

maybe that's why blowup dolls were invented.... just a temporary stand in when someone is required to 'be there' and then pack them up and send them away for the rest of the time...

i suppose that's why i have teddy in bed and my cheer squad on the couch in the loungeroom... and my girls out the back...

poor tails is losing her bum feathers again - it looks like there's been an attack in the chook yard but it's just her bum malting a shitload of feathers, poor thing...

and then throwing them some feed - first the layer pellets, as usual black goes running after the pellets before they even hit the ground which means she gets covered in them as well..... then she goes looking around, doesn't see any sunflower seeds (from the free range mix), and then she turns around and looks at me with the container in my hand and grumbles at me, as if to say "i know you've still got the good stuff in there, just throw it to me already!"

so i do, and again she bolts to chase the food before it hits the ground, and again she is covered in it for a few moments... goes for all the sunflower seeds she can find before tails gets in there, and that's it... the rest of it will sit there until they get bored lol

well i told her "if you're gonna be like that with food then i'll stop feeding you!"

if it's the same stuff on the ground tomorrow after work, i'll do just that, she always learns quickly and eats up for the next day's treats lol

got some more tomatoes off the bushes, so might chop the ones i have at the moment and make a little salad up...

and going to try a batch of the mince that robyn gave me last week, make a bolognaise type thing - been a few years since i've made it.....